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First
Impressions
One of the most frequently asked questions we receive from singles here at Table For Six is “What is the most effective way to make a best first impression?” The answer is really simple: Have good manners. Treating others with kindness sets the bar for yourself. It makes sense to apply this to dating, just as you would with your work and social life.
“Sarcasm doesn’t translate well in text format.”
We’ve all heard the saying “actions speak louder than words”. If you say you will call on Tuesday at eight- do it! Show each person you consider dating that they are important. When you fail to follow through, you are not inspiring confidence that you are worthy of their devotion. It may sound harsh, but part of falling in love is allowing yourself to be vulnerable and that can’t happen if you don’t establish trust from the very beginning.
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Discuss the best way to easily communicate early on- be it calling, texting, or email. Don’t assume that they check email every day or keep their cell phone on at all times; ask what works best for them. Try not to rely too heavily on text or email at first. Talk on the phone or meet in person a few times to get familiar with each other’s tone and sense of humor so that you can better understand their correspondence style. This is particularly relevant if either of you has a dry sense of humor. Sarcasm doesn’t translate well in text format so be cautious so that you don’t confuse your date or put them on the defensive.
“Take an honest assessment of your past behaviors
and think of solutions in order to improve without making excuses.”
Showing up on time is the first indicator that you take your commitments seriously. A lot of preparation goes into designating the time and place, getting dolled up, and traveling to your destination. The time your date spends waiting for you is time they spend doubting their decision to meet up with you. Every minute counts so make the most of your time -and theirs- to start things off on the upswing.
Be responsive. If someone were to greet you in person you wouldn’t ignore them! So if you get a text, call or email respond as soon as you are able. Calls should be returned within 24 hours and, because texting is instantaneous, take a second to respond even if to say that you aren’t able to chat now, but that you will follow up at X time. The clock ticks a lot slower when you are waiting for a response!
Take an honest assessment of your past behaviors and think of solutions in order to improve without making excuses. Have you ever heard someone say “I’m just not a phone person”? In today’s world of modern technology, there is no reason not to be a good communicator. If you are consistently running late (your boss can probably give you an honest answer!), make a point to always be at your destination 30 minutes early. Unexpected things may arise occasionally and when they do, acknowledge the situation, offer an apology, and set up that next date!
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Match of the Month What Markus Says
"From our first date I could see that Sheri was someone special. She was very talkative and always smiling. She has a great sense of humor and the way she delivers it sometimes catches you off guard which is fun. She really has a lot of passion for the things she loves to do. Another thing that I love is her easy going personality and how flexible she is when we make decisions together. I really admire that as I am very much the same way. Pretty much in a nutshell, I feel Sheri is the type of person that I can go or do pretty much anything with and know that we’ll have good time. She is a very beautiful girl! We’ve been dating for 4 months and I’ve never been happier!"
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What Sheri Says
"Thank you so much for setting Markus and I up. I never imagined that I would find a guy who is so understanding and thoughtful. What I really love about him is that he is so easy to talk to and he has been so patient and kind in his approach to our relationship. When I am with him I feel so beautiful and taken care of. I am very independent and it’s huge for me to feel this way with someone. We always have so much fun together, too! This weekend we’re going to a friend’s wedding and in a few weeks he is coming with me to my company picnic. It’s awesome to have someone you care about to bring a long for things like this! I am so grateful to have him in my life."
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Matchmaker's Tip
"If you don’t feel compelled to communicate or show up regularly, it’s time to let go. It is frustrating to wait around for someone and even worse is never hearing from them again without a reason why. This can be tough, but you both will feel better in the long run about your dating life. Even if you only met each other once, you should make it a point to let the other person know how you feel. It isn’t necessary to make a big to-do about it, but don’t assume that your date already knows you aren’t into them OR that they’ll be broken hearted! Trust us, you will both come out on the other side just fine!"
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